Duplicity Inbox

[girod]

You've reached Clark Kent. I'm not here right now, unfortunately. Please leave a message after the tone and I'll get back to you as soon as possible. Thanks!

[text | audio | video | action | prose | etc.]

Comments

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

I'd prefer this.
[And you asking that is confirmation of several of the many reasons he loves you.]

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

All right, then here's what I'm thinking:

This isn't Vegas.

And what's happening here isn't something I intend to just jam in a closet like it didn't happen when I get home. That isn't honest or fair, to you or I or Lois.

Did it happen because of extraordinary circumstances? Yes. But that's the vast majority of things that happen in our lives.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

We aren't from the same point in the timeline, Clark.

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

And?

When has my word or your word not been enough?

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

to each other, or at all?

[Because he's failed plenty.

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

To each other.

And eventually, one or the other will remember.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

There wouldn't be much to miss, if I didn't remember.

I'm still afraid of Lois.

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

Lois believes in truth.

The whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

The truth existed before we were here.
[He has loved you for a long time, Clark. He'll be doing that forever, no matter what happens here or after it.]

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

Part of the truth is the choice to act on it.

We made that choice.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

I was never suggesting we hide it from her.

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

Pretending like it goes away is hiding it from her just as much.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

Clark.

I didn't think it was a thing that was going to continue. I'm still not sure it is. That's different than pretending it never did to Lois.

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

I never thought that was something we'd even consider.

That's not what I'm talking about.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

Do you want to elaborate on the why 'we' wouldn't consider it, or what you are talking about first?

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

I never thought you would want me to hide everything that happens here from Lois.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

I was thinking of the wrong 'it'. My apologies.

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

Which were you talking about?

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

The...specific situation being here has left us in. That there'd be anything to tell her.

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

It's something I'm going to discuss with her.

That I'd like both of us to discuss with her.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

Why is this a risk you're willing to take?

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

Anything else but this is a risk.

This is the least risky way.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

[There is a pause this time, and when the answer comes... it's text but it's very much raw, honest, and vulnerable even if it doesn't seem that way - or wouldn't to most.]

I don't understand.

Re: Text, un: B

[girod]

[ And that more than anything tells him how important it is for him to explain this. ]

Bruce.

Emotional honesty is just as important as anything else with a partner. With all partners.

You. And Lois.

Feelings don't just go away because now they're inconvenient. And a relationship like this shouldn't just be put away because it's no longer necessary.

It was never necessary, Bruce.

I chose, *we* chose, to go this route because I have to believe both of us always wanted it and when we had the opportunity, when other factors weren't in play, we went for it.

We both know we could just fill our quotas and make our contracts with random people we'd never see again, people who we would lose as soon as we got home.

We didn't.

And I made that choice knowing that when I get back, my relationship with you (however the timeline works out) will be, *has to be* different.

Re: Text, un: B

[knightbynight]

You're reasoning and conclusions are both accurate and sound; you're right, about their being risk and almost everything else.

But while my decision here was in part a decision to take an opportunity, that decision didn't come with an expectation of long term change. I won't deny the possibility, but it isn't an expectation.

I can make, and have made, quota without you. My behavior with you here is very different than it would be without you. That was part of my choice, beyond desire or opportunity.